Yourself or Someone Like You: Long Day, Jamie, and the Songs That Stayed

Lauren Nixon-Matney • January 22, 2026
Yourself or Someone Like You: Long Day, Jamie, and the Songs That Stayed

Matchbox Twenty: Long Day

Pixel art illustration of an open CD case floating in a starry night sky, featuring the album

I’ve loved a lot of voices in my life; raspy ones, silky ones, wild ones, broken ones. But if I’m being honest? It’s probably a tie between Otis Redding and Rob Thomas, with Rob pulling slightly ahead.


There’s just something about the way he sings like gravel and soul had a baby and raised it on broken hearts and sunrise drives. I don’t know how else to explain it. His voice has always felt like something I could trust. Like it knew things I hadn’t said out loud yet.


Matchbox 20’s Yourself or Someone Like You was the third CD I ever owned.

The first was Jagged Little Pill, which I managed to convince a family member to buy for me because Alanis, obviously. The second, Tragic Kingdom, was handed to me by Trey with a smirk and the line:

“You need to add this to your collection especially if you’re getting into talented babe music.”


And then came Matchbox Twenty.

I begged my brother to order it for me through BMG those wild, glorious Columbia House days when kids with no money somehow ended up with stacks of CDs anyway. And when it came in the mail, I swear, I held it like it was a sacred object.


We were living in Bent Tree Apartments in Greensboro, North Carolina at the time...me, Bobby, our mom, and nanny. It was after the divorce. The apartment complex was all hills and trees and these magical little tucked away spots that made it feel more like a forest village than a neighborhood.


That winter, it snowed.

We used plastic tub lids to slide down the hills by the park, laughing and spinning until our faces were numb and pink with joy. It was the first time Bobby and I really got to experience snow, and I can still see it that sparkling hush, the slope, the thrill.


And while the world outside was white and new, I was inside with a borrowed CD player thanks to Bobby, who didn’t have to let me use it, but did.

I played Yourself or Someone Like You over and over and over again, like it was breathing for me.


Track two.

“Long Day.”


That song wrecked me in the best way.

The passion in the lyrics, the sound of Rob Thomas just laying his whole soul bare. It felt like he was singing for all of us who were holding it together on the outside but quietly breaking inside. I didn’t fully understand it then, but I felt it. And I kept feeling it for years.


I thought I might never meet anyone who loved that song as much as I did.

Until Jamie.



A few weeks into falling for each other, before either of us really knew we were falling Jamie handed me his CD case in the passenger seat of his white Mustang and said, “Pick something.”


It smelled like Axe body spray and freedom. The windows were cracked just enough to let the late afternoon air twist through the car, stirring up something electric between us that neither of us wanted to name yet.


I flipped through the thick plastic sleeves of the zip-up binder, scanning the covers, hoping for a sign.

And there it was.

Yourself or Someone Like You.

Like a little universe tucked between everything else.


I smiled to myself, slid the disc out, and popped it into the stereo.

The speakers crackled awake, and suddenly, there we were me, him, and Rob Thomas, all sharing the same stretch of highway.


He started singing along immediately loud, proud, and completely unashamed.

I knew every word, too, but I stayed quiet for a second, just listening, stunned.

Because it wasn’t just that he knew the song.

It was how he sang it.


Like it mattered.

Like it lived inside him the way it lived inside me.


And when “Long Day” rolled around and he hit that first weary, worn out note, it was like a handful of stars lit up inside me at once. It felt like finding a constellation I didn’t even know I was looking for.

Jamie beside me, singing it like a prayer he already knew by heart.

The whole night shifted it was like a quiet kind of gravity pulled me closer.

Like two people finding the same star in a sky full of noise.



When Jamie and I fell for each other, I moved into the townhouse he was already sharing with two roommates. It wasn’t glamorous, and it wasn’t totally uncomplicated but somehow, in the middle of all that, we carved out a world of our own.


Our bedroom wasn’t just a bedroom.

It was a tiny studio, a fortress, a starting line.

We had a love seat crammed against one wall, a computer desk against another, a washer and dryer tucked into a closet nearby. It smelled like clean clothes and late nights and all the hope you don’t know how to name yet when you’re young and barely beginning.


Jamie helped me pick out my first real laptop—black, sleek, compact, and perfect—and that night, we sat side by side on the love seat, downloading songs we loved. Making mix CDs. Building soundtracks we didn’t realize we’d still be carrying decades later.


And somewhere between the old favorites and the new discoveries, I found it.

Rob Thomas’ cover of “Time After Time.”


I had loved that song my whole life the Cyndi Lauper version, delicate and aching but hearing Rob sing it?

It was like finding a lost language I had somehow always spoken.


His voice, raw and beautiful and a little broken around the edges wrapped around the lyrics like it had been waiting for them.

For me.


I felt a soft tear well up as we sat there, wrapped in the glow of the computer screen, listening.

Not speaking.

Just letting the music say all the things we didn’t know how to say yet.


That night, sitting cross legged on a secondhand love seat in a too big room, I realized something simple and enormous:


Some voices find you when you need them most.

And sometimes, if you’re lucky, you find someone who sings along with you...time after time.



Pixel art Polaroid portrait of a young couple, Lauren and Jamie standing side by side, representing early stages of young love for Searching For Stars memoir and musical echolalia experience.

RESUME THE RHYTHM:

DRIFT THROUGH A CONSTELLATION OF MEMORY

Searching For Stars

By Lauren Nixon-Matney July 5, 2026
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By Lauren Nixon-Matney July 5, 2026
My favorite literary phrase of all time is spoken by Josephine March, written by Louisa May Alcott in Little Women. “I like good, strong words that mean something.” You, my dear, you say good, strong words that mean something. You put good, strong words that mean something into the world, and I thank you so very sincerely for that. You have made such an incredible impact on my life, and on my outlook on beauty and aging. ⸻ I stumbled across your incredible fashion sense on Instagram and was completely hooked on your vibe. I absolutely love fashion. I always have. I’ve definitely had my own kind of zany style over the years. So when I saw you, I was like, OK, yes, she is amazing. I love this energy. ⸻ The way you put things together, the confidence, the energy, it makes you wanna get up, go into your closet, and actually enjoy getting dressed again. And for a woman approaching 40, who’s had three children and has had many of her own struggles with who am I, what’s my fashion, what’s my energy, or what’s my style, You just felt so damn refreshing and inspiring. So I hung around, but what really hooked me wasn’t just the style, it was you, the essence of you. The way you talk, the honesty, the fact that you just say things straight, no fluff, no sugarcoating, no trying to be anything other than exactly who you are.. and somehow that makes everything you say sound even more profound. ⸻ The impact your message was having in my life became undeniable. It wasn’t just something I watched for enjoyment anymore, it was something I actually began feeling, and carrying with me. I grew up in a time where it felt like there was an expiration date on women. Like if you didn’t fit into a certain mold, or size, or type… your worth somehow became less. And then life happens. You grow up. You age. Maybe have kids. Your body changes. Your priorities change. Somewhere in the middle of all of that, you can kind of lose your sense of… who am I now? What’s my style? Who am I supposed to become? Am I too late for something? What even feels like me anymore? So for a while, I think I actually bought into that idea without even realizing it. The idiodic notion that maybe I had passed some invisible point where things were supposed to quiet down. Tone down. Fit into something more “acceptable.” Or the grand illusion that I was out of time to follow my passions! But watching you… that narrative just started to fall apart. The way you show up, the way you speak, the way you move through the world so fully as yourself… it made me realize that aging isn’t something to fear or shrink from. If anything, it’s where things start to get really good. It’s where you get bolder. More comfortable. More you. More beautiful. ⸻ What you’re doing matters so much. The way you show up, the way you speak, the way you fully own who you are, it doesn’t just stay on a screen. It carries through pixelated waves. It reaches people like me, in real life, in real moments, and shifts something quietly but powerfully within us. So I just wanted to say thank you. For your honesty, your energy, your style, your voice… all of it. You have inspired me, Searching for Stars, and undoubtedly countless women all over the world more than words can truly translate. Thank you, for being you!
By Lauren Nixon-Matney May 6, 2026
Okay, so I asked God for a sign this week… and I didn’t make it easy on Him. I had just seen this video about asking for a sign, about how God answers, about how He delights in it… and something in me just… recognized that. Like, oh. I’ve felt that before. Lindsey, it was your video. And the second I heard it, I remembered something. I remembered a time, years ago, back in that early, foggy, pinkless season of motherhood, when I had asked for a sign too. I had prayed, really specifically… really honestly… “God, just show me I’m okay. Show me I’m on the right path.” And I asked for a blue butterfly. I didn’t see it right away. I waited. I wondered if I had imagined the whole idea in the first place. And then, not long after, life moved us somewhere new. A new place, new energy… the kind of move that feels exciting and terrifying all at once. They handed us the keys… and right there on them… was a blue butterfly. And I remember feeling that same quiet recognition. Like… okay. And then, a couple months after that, with prayers inside us building for a second child, we went to a park. One of those ordinary days that turns into something you don’t forget. And there were butterflies everywhere. Hundreds of them. Yellow, filling the air, lifting all at once like something out of a dream. And right in the middle of it… one blue butterfly. I just stood there, overwhelmed, because I knew. I knew I had been heard. Nearly one year to the day later, our second child was born. And then… life kept moving. Time passed. Things got busy. Full. Loud. Beautiful… but a little hazy, too. Somewhere along the way, I think I stopped asking like that. Fast forward. I’m sitting with my kids on New Year’s Eve, going into 2025, talking about goals and dreams. The kind of things you say out loud but don’t always fully claim. “I’ve always wanted to write.” And my daughter, so sure, so certain, just looked at me and said, “Then make it your New Year’s resolution.” And something about the way she said it… she didn’t question it. she didn’t overthink it. She just… believed it was possible. So I did. I started building something I’ve carried in pieces since I was in high school. Old notebooks, scattered thoughts, songs, memories… things I’ve never really known how to explain out loud. And for the first time, it felt like someone actually got it. So I got to work. Writing with a baby asleep on my chest… voice notes, typed drafts, music playing in the background… piecing together old memories with new ones. And I love it. I really do. But if I’m being honest… I started to wonder. Is this meaningful? Is this worth the time? Is this something good… or just something I want? And more than anything… I wanted to know if it was something God saw as good. Not just something that looked meaningful… but something that was. So I sat down, quietly, and I prayed. And I said, “God, if this is something I’m supposed to keep building… if I’m on the right path… if this is your will for me… please just show me. Give me a sign.” And I paused… because I knew I couldn’t ask for something easy. I had asked for butterflies before and blue jays have been unusually common in our backyard lately. I needed something specific. Something I wouldn’t just brush off. I looked over… and saw this little pink and white poodle sitting on my daughter’s shelf. And I laughed a little and said, “Okay God… show me a poodle.” almost sarcastically thinking… well, this one’s going to take a little more effort. But of course… Not even 48 hours later, we ran into Burlington. We were just there to grab socks and shoes for my toddler, her sandals were bothering her. Quick in, quick out. We ended up wandering a little. We’re headed to checkout… and my husband steps down an aisle, picks something up, and goes, “Okay, I know this is ridiculous… but we need this for the office.” And he had no idea. Nothing about my prayer. Nothing about the poodle. I’m barely paying attention yet. And then he turns it around. It’s a painting. Of a poodle. Not just a poodle… a poodle in a full business suit… sitting at a desk… reading a newspaper. I just… stopped. A business professional poodle, for the office we’re building together, a space where I can write. Like everything in me went quiet for a second. Because of all the things in the world I could have asked for… of all the ways that prayer could have been answered… it was that. I remember thinking, smiling, fighting back tears of joy… of course it is. Because I had asked for something specific. And apparently… He has a sense of humor. Also, just to make sure I didn’t miss it… because let’s be real, God definitely knows how to show out… the very next place we went… was Petco. And there was this real poodle. Then again. And again. Every aisle I turned… I kept running into it. And that feeling came back. The same one from before. Quiet. Certain. seen. beloved. Lindsey… Thank you so much, you reminded me to ask. You reminded me that God doesn’t just hear us… He answers. Not always in big, overwhelming ways… but in ways we’ll recognize. In ways that feel personal. Specific. Sometimes even funny… like they were meant just for us. And Lindsey… I just want you to know how much I appreciate all of what you’re doing. Your energy, your humor, the way you show up so fully as yourself… it matters more than you probably realize. You make people laugh, you make motherhood feel seen, and you bring light into spaces that can feel heavy sometimes. But there is also so much more than that… God really radiates through you. In the way you speak, in the way you encourage, in the way you remind people to keep going and to keep believing. It’s powerful. And it’s beautiful to witness. What you’ve created with “get your pink back”… that message, that reminder… it’s reaching people. It’s lifting people. It’s giving something back to women who feel like they’ve poured everything out. And that matters. It really does. I’m so grateful I came across your video when I did. And I’m really looking forward to everything you create next… especially your writing. You’re doing something good here. Keep going. Please never stop casting your light into the world… it really does break through the darkness.
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