Co-Pilot: Detours and Destinies

Lauren Nixon-Matney • May 4, 2025

Co-Pilot: Detours and Destinies

Letters To Cleo: Co-Pilot

Pixel art image of Lauren and Jamie riding together down the highway at night under a star-filled sky, symbolizing romantic journeys, life's unexpected detours, and destiny in a Searching for Stars universe.

When we first got together, people warned me.

“He’s no good. He’ll break your heart.”

Funny, considering that’s exactly how this song starts.


And they were right...just not in the way they meant.

We’ve hurt each other. We’ve broken each other’s hearts.

But love isn’t about avoiding the cracks.

It’s about whether you can piece them back together,

whether you’re still standing next to each other when the dust settles.


You drive, I navigate.


That’s the setup, but in reality, we’re both just making it up as we go, following the curves, trusting the road, finding our way in the spaces between.


Somewhere between the streetlights and the stardust, we found our rhythm.

Not in the grand moments, but in the in-betweens

in the way your hand finds mine without looking,

in the way we miss the right turn but never lose our way.

 

We dance in kitchens like the floor is a map,

like we are tracing every road we’ve taken to get here.

Your hand in mine, spinning, spinning,

two bodies in motion, caught in their own gravity.


We get lost on backroads with the windows down,

your voice rising over the static of old songs on the radio,

and somehow, we always end up right where we’re meant to be.


Life speeds by, a blur of neon signs and headlights.

We are co-pilots in a world that never slows down,

navigating with nothing but instinct,

spinning worlds like roulette wheels,

chasing sunrises, chasing each other,

never needing a destination only the ride.


And I know there will be rough roads,

days when the car breaks down, when the gas runs low,

when the rain makes it impossible to see what’s ahead.

But I also know you’ll be there, one hand on the wheel,

one hand reaching for mine,

telling me, like you always do,

“We’ve been through worse. We’ll figure it out.”


So, maybe you did break my heart.

And I broke yours.

But we never let it be the end of the story.

We kept driving, kept choosing, kept moving forward

Some loves are soft like slow-dancing,

but ours is wild wind in our hair,

barefoot on the dashboard,

laughing too hard to breathe.

A love built on running toward something unseen,

on never needing to know where the road ends,

only that we’re taking it together.


We move like constellations

orbiting, spinning, drawn back to each other.


Some loves are made for whispered words and stillness.

But ours is movement, momentum, a streak of light across the sky

impossible to hold, impossible to stop. 


Maybe love isn’t about where you’re going,

but who’s in the passenger seat when you get there. 

RESUME THE RHYTHM:

DRIFT THROUGH A CONSTELLATION OF MEMORY

Searching For Stars

By Lauren Nixon-Matney April 12, 2026
Film: Young Guns 1 & 2 Bon Jovi : Blaze of Glory
By Lauren Nixon-Matney April 12, 2026
*A letter of light for Rosey Blair* Okay this is going to sound oddly specific but stay with me... You remind me of a very particular kind of feeling. The kind that lives somewhere between fall air, soft lighting, and a childhood movie that most people forgot existed, but the ones who remember it? Oh we remember. The 1987 Chipmunk Adventure! Which I did not expect to ever connect to another adult human about, and yet here I am. There’s just something about that movie the movement, the music, the chaos, the fun, the outfits, the chipettes... like being in motion and color and sound at the same time. And watching you feels like that again in a weirdly beautiful , full circle way. Not in a “this is aesthetic content” way more like a “this is a person who actually lives inside her life” way. And ironically that’s what makes your aesthetic top notch in my opinion. Cozy but not fake. Honest and raw but not too harsh. Funny without trying to perform funny. (which is rarer than people think) There’s a warmth in how you show up that feels familiar in a way I can’t fully explain but definitely recognize. I came across you scrolling my phone, postpartum, trying to find my footing again. At the time I was in that weird in between space, relearning my body, trying to feel like myself inside something that had completely changed... yet again. And you showed up in your space on instagram in a way that felt real. Authentic. Original. Not “perfect body positivity” not curated confidence just a woman existing in her body dressing it, living in it, laughing in it and making that feel normal again. Healthy. Beautiful. Fun! Something I really grew to respect about you was that you didn’t stay frozen in one version of that message or yourself just to make people comfortable. You shifted. And I really admire the way you talk about Changing your mind. Leaving spaces that don’t feel right anymore. Figuring out that loving yourself isn’t one fixed version it evolves. That kind of honesty is quietly powerful and extremely profound. You evolved and changed your mind out loud. And people always have something to say when a woman does that... but you stayed steady anyway. That kind of self trust? That’s the part people don’t talk about enough. That’s what bravery looks like in real time! You don’t just create content, you create an honest space for people to re-meet themselves in whatever version they’re currently in. It’s the kind of magic that doesn’t need to be announced it just exists, and people feel it when they orbit around it. You didn’t just show up on my feed, you showed up in a moment where I needed to feel like myself again. Like a song you forgot you loved until it comes back on and suddenly you remember everything. And somehow through outfits, honesty, humor, book reviews and a lot of zany ingenuity... you saved parts of my girlhood that likely make me a better mother. Thanks so much for being you! Thanks for being real. Thanks for taking up space, your energy’s reach is more powerful than you ever might have imagined. P.S... I have to add this because it lives rent free in my brain! That Taylor Swift workout series you did?!? absolutely unhinged in the best way It was funny and chaotic and somehow still motivating… I'm not deep in Taylor Swift knowledge territory, but it made me pause and go “okay wait... there’s something here.” The way she owns her work, reclaims it, redraws the line that I own me energy it felt incredibly aligned with what you were doing too. With love, light and gratitude, Stay Weird! -Lauren “I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.” -Louisa May Alcott
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